I was reading someone else's blog and this lovely chap was talking about gay celebrities in Philippine Showbiz and such. It got me all giggly because, let's face it, in showbiz, straight men are the chosen few. So many of them are truly on the pink side... well, maybe not pinkPINK. Maybe a bit on burgundy, or sangria, or perhaps, maroon - rarely are they fuchsia, cerise or magenta.
I've only had the luck of dating one D-lister, a professional singer named Joaquin (whether this is his real name or not, you would have to guess). Last I heard, he was doing moderately well. He caters to the bakya crowd fairly well - I know for a fact that grandmothers gravitate toward him like anything. He had a concert at the Araneta Coliseum last year, and according to the papers, it was well-received. ANYway, we had a short affair. To be honest, I didn't like him that much, nor was he great in bed. His dick is ok, not bad, but nothing to really scream and shout about.
I still don't know why I did it. I guess I just wanted the thrill of being fucked by someone famous. We were going out when I finally left the Philippines, and when I broke the news, he began crying (I wasn't) and (I'm not joking here) singing "If You're Not the One". Yes, he was teary-eyed and all, AND singing fucking Daniel Bedingfield. (aside: I had one other suitor here who used that song as part of his Birthday Mix-tape. I dumped him the day after.). I found it hard not to roll my eyes.
To be honest, I was forcing myself to cry so that it won't be TOO embarrassing for the guy, but seriously, I couldn't care less for him. As far as I am concerned, they are all just bad actors in a bad telemovie that I always skip on TV.
(another aside: I think my mother was less than enthused when she saw him in our house. Thinking about it now, maybe it was because I gave a less-than-enthusiastic introduction.)
I know, I know. I am being mean. Sorry. I'm sure he too is regretting the day he laid his eyes on me. It's not as if I can vouch to be the most awe-inspiring boyfriend in the world. I know all too well what my shortcomings are.
I dunno. Anyway, I had "fun" - but seriously, there are some fantasies that are left unquenched. Now, I just laugh at all these celebrities trying to be straight. I'm sure they are lousy in bed as well.
To Joaquin, you know this is about you. I hope you and C work out. You deserve a great career, given your amazing pipes. Ingat, pare, and find love despite your sarimanok. Be happy.