Tuesday, 9 May 2017

Brazilian Beef

Okay, so I have been massively remiss in my posts. Sorry. I have been very busy at work, sadly. I was promoted kasi to queen bee. Iba na talaga kasi long-leggedness, with matching side slit hanggang kilay. To be honest, I started this entry two months ago. Anyway, read on...


I was making visit a client the other day, and we had high tea (tszenez!) which lasted pretty much the whole afternoon. It was a productive meeting so I decided to reward myself... with a visit to a local beat.

Now, beats are a tricky little thing. Sometimes feeling ko Winona... sometimes, feeling Wet Sister (read: basang sis). It's really luck of the draw and no amount of botox (truckload, mga hija, TRAAAAK) in the world can help with that.

Anyway, I went into one of the cubicles, and peering out, I saw a head of curls across from me. That meant Mr Curly would be around 5'8? Or thereabouts? Not that it matters much; to be honest, ako naman, tall, short, young, old, whachevs!

Back to the story: I assumed he was standing on tiptoes at this point, and somehow found that very cute.

So I decided to stand up and unlock the door. I had been playing with my batuta so it was getting ready for action. He peered up from the door and saw that my door was open. There was a preview of my ewan, and he gave a "Pwede na" shrug.

Ako naman ang reakshen, "Tangina mo."

I was about to close my door (sheer gay pride!) when he opened his and I saw his body in its entirety. He was shorter than I am, around late 30's, and I'm sorry, walang fez value. Talagang Chaka the face till ever and back to Neverland, round trip. He was smiling sheepishly, and while it was a nice smile, it really could not redeem.

He had unbuttoned his flannel shirt, which was oversized to begin with, and it revealed a very thin body, no muscle whatsoever, with a bit of chest fuzz - definitely not enough to muzzle up against to. He was wearing torn grey jeans, and it was unbuttoned. I was about to close the door when he revealed his soft member...

... which was around 7 inches. Uncut. Soft.

At that point, my knees bent and I fell to the ground with matching Beyonce' whiplash. The clouds parted, light shone down from the heavens, and ... it was glorious!

I opened my door again and seeing that the coast was clear, walked to his cubicle and closed the door behind me.

My golly gulay, up close it was even better than I imagined. It was definitely porn star level. His foreskin was super thick which made his penoy look even bigger than normal.

Ka. Low. Kah.

I began making chupa and I have to say it's the most beauteous feeling ever. Of course, you can't make subo everything - I could only fit half of it in my mouth. The other half was enough for my hand. Yes, ladies and ladies, it was THAT big.

I continued sucking him off and my gulay he was loud! Gusto kong sabihin, "Hija, we are not alone, ha." Well, actually we were alone, but that was not the point.

He stopped moaning and looked down at me while I was doing my chupaliciousness. He pulled me up for a moment, said "My goodness, you are beautiful." Ako naman, CHENK YOU with matching blushness! Let's face it - I'm 7,000 years old, medyo (ahem) "chunky" and well, overall, not nice to look at.

I thanked him for the compliment, and asked him where he was from. "Brazil," he said.


The closest thing I've had to Brazilian meat was in a barbecue. And if this is what Brazil has to offer, well, YES-NESS!!! For sure!!!!

I sank down again, all the while, running my hands all over his body. He had no fat whatsoever, and he moaned as my fingernails dug deeper on his back. I licked him everywhere and my gulay, the more I explored, the more breathless he became.

He had an 11 incher, for sure, and was thick to the point that I could not wrap my hand around his penoy. Even if I tried to deep throat the guy, there was enough for one hand and a half to help him along. It was undoubtedly the biggest penoy I have ever had. I sucked on that for a long time, and I enjoyed it. He stopped me at one point because he said he was close, so I started on other things.

His balls were dark, hairless and slightly bigger than normal, although they looked small compared to his batuts. They were sensitive so that he told me to stop licking after a few minutes because he wanted to enjoy me more.

Ako naman, sige. Pero continue to explore of course! I spread his legs and saw his hole. He shaved so I could see where the hair starting to slowly grow, but it give a clear view of his virgin ass. I could tell it was unexplored territory which he confirmed later on. I licked it slowly at first, and then with more vigour.

That took him over the edge. He whispered he was cumming, and I quickly put his penoy back into my mouth. He came - not too much though. Maybe 3 bursts and after that he was spent. His juice was a bit bitter - I was not a fan personally. Pero since it came from that horse, I was ok with it.

We both washed up and walked out, talking like old friends. He said he didn't do this too often but his wife was mad at him (or something like that - honest, the accent, like his batuta, was very thick). He said he was very happy to meet me and would like to meet again soon, because he was not able to help me out.

Well, let's see how next time pans out.

Thursday, 1 December 2016


Now let's fez it. I've gotten to the point of no rechurn. I've finally truly aged.

Napapansin ko lang na the glances are getting few and far between, and those who glance are now past the bingo numbers themselves. The fag-gets no longer smile and their raised eyebrows now vomit out a different meaning.

And such is life, nough?

But once in a while, may himala. Case in point: gym showers today.

On days like today, I love taking long showers. If not for play, then maybe for perve. When this guy entered, automatically I Linda-Blaired. Mega-kalukray! He was clearly Lebanese with matching full beard. He was one of the few gym members who was really beautiful, totally porn worthy. He was built like a fafa and ... just speechless akish!

Anyway there were only eight shower cubicles (no door so easy to look), four each side, super convenient. As in mega love!! He took a stall that was farthest from mine, which also happened to be the closest to the liquid soap. In my head, winner! That means may I tingin ako while pretending to get more soap.

And that was the plan. I wash myself a bit under the running water, tacos soap with matching tinggin. Walk to shower and rinse again.

To be honest, in hindsight, I think he knew. Let's face it - there's only so much soap a man really needs. So medyo I was surprised na by the 6th time, I went to the dispenser to realise: syet. May hardon ang Lady Gaga! He was still slightly turned away from me so at one point I wasn't too sure but as I was removing my doubts, he turned full on to face me.

Definitely nota republic!

He looked at me straight in the eye, and smiled. Abba! Chiquitita! With both hands, he gestured to his penoy and had a look of "sige" I walked closer to him and reached out to grab his penoy. 

It was a nice nota, very hard and the skin was very tight. It was around 4 inches, semi hard, pero very thick. It actually matched his frame well. Sadly circumcised pero such is life. He shaved everything from chest downward so it was so weird seeing him with a hairy beard and nothing else. No chest or armpit hair - it might be a Lebanese thing. Who knows?

Anyway I reached for the penoy and managed to tug it for 5 seconds and then he pulled my hand away. He grabbed my shoulders and pushed me down, a little too rough for my liking pero at least I got the hint.

I was on my knees and in front of me, a shaved penoy. That was when the earthquake really began. He grabbed the base of my head and pumped away. Ako naman sanay as action but this was really different to usual. Talagang galit sya!

What made things more difficult was that the water was still running and water running down his body and onto my face... well it made for good porn pero tangina I needed to breathe!

Still, professional! I kept at it. A few times I popped out to catch my breath pero he just forced it back in. Gusto ko tuloy kagatin! I was starting to not enjoy myself despite the fact he was truly a specimen.

In a few minutes, he grunted and came in my mouth. No warning, ha. To make it worse, I could tell he ate asparagus recently. Yuckness!
He pulled out of my mouth and turned around to resume his shower. He sighed and grunted something that sounded like disgust as I walked away.

I guess the lesson here is that some eye candy is not worth biting into.

Sunday, 13 November 2016

Screwing Sandpaper

Hi Alen: Thanks for the comment. I am back for a bit - not sure how long I can keep it up, but hey, you can never can tell (haha).

This little event happened a few months back. I didn't post about it then, because it wasn't my favorite event in the world... but hey, it was what it was.

I walked in to a local Marrickville sex shop that had a sex room in the back. Some of these guys are really not gay - a good chunk of them are sad, closet cases but hey, that's their drama and I'd rather not focus on that.

Anyway, I sat down, and watched the film. It was not the best show in the world - a chick with a dick who was jacking off and playing with her butt hole at the same time. Since no choice naman ako, I decided to just sit and wait for a better movie.

As my eyes adjusted to the dark room, I noticed that there were only three of us. One guy was in his 60's, black and big, and he was obviously stoned off his face. The other guy three seats to my right was a different story - he had muscle under that fat, but he was still cute as.

I decided that I should take matters to my own hands - or in this case, my mouth. I stood up, and walked over to the black guy first. His pants were unzipped, so it was really just a matter of opening up a flap and taking out his cock. It was surprisingly cut and thick, around three inches. The guy slid down his seat for a bit, giving me better access to his cock. His pubes were short and his cock was semi-hard and smelled of smoke.

I normally don't like smelly cocks, but his cock was really quite nice to act on so I decided why not. I began pumping like a train and it was getting to hard... ish. He began moaning and was clearly enjoying it.

After a minute, I heard shuffling of seats and I looked behind me. The other guy was now an arm's length away, and my gulay he was rough looking. He was around mid-50's, white but tanned to a rough leather skin. He had brown, tousled hair, and under his jacket, he had his construction outfit, dirty and smelly... and somehow sexy.

Anyway, I continued sucking the black guy off, but angled my head so that I can see the other guy as well. Not stopping the sucking, I reached out and started massaging the other guys crotch. His zipper was wide open and his undies were pulled under his hairy balls. I began massaging his member and it was thick. Super thick. And uncut. And rough.

Okay, I was not sure why, but his cock was really dry. But ... that never stops me.

I turned my attention to the other guy - and began sucking him off. He was clearly enjoying it and raised his hand to the other guy, who high-fived him back. He then leaned back and reached over to the other guy to jack him off.

Personally, I actually liked the white guy because he was really into it. He also had a better cock. However, part of me thinks that the black guy would be a challenge, and I wanted to see if I could make him come.

So I went back to the black guy and went to town. I continued to jack the other guy off for a few seconds but he stood up. Initially, I thought he had lost interest or just wanted to watch. But in a few seconds, I felt a couple of hands managing my belt loose. I continued sucking off black guy while my pants and jocks pulled to my knees. He spread my cheeks apart, and started licking my ass. Like his cock, his tongue was surprisingly rough but hey, it felt really good.

I continued to suck on the guy while the guy went down on me. He then stood up and lubed me up. He fingered me and then, angled his cock onto my hole. With a gentle nudge, he was inside me. Even then, I could feel the roughness of his cock on my hole. Pero no complaints!

The white guy began pounding away, and my God, I felt his power. His hands were rough on my waist and it was clear that he meant business. Talagang walang patawad!

The white guy did not have the biggest member, but my God, he was definitely into it. He began grunting with every pump and it was just kalukring! It was like getting a gorilla fuck me raw.

He was definitely hard as fuck, and because he was really thicker than usual, I really wanted to get more lube up. I stopped sucking the black guy, and said "Can you add more lube, mate?" But the guy just kept on pumping away, and to be honest, I just felt like I just wanted to finish anyway.

I continued sucking on the guy, with his semi-hard dick getting harder and softer in intervals.  To be honest, I wasn't too sure if the black guy was really into it, but I was also starting to get a bit sore down there.

I looked up and voila, the black guy was officially passed out. Wow. My talents were clearly not enough. Letche.

At that point, the white guy began grunting louder and with one trust, he came in me. I could feel a couple of bursts of cum in me while his hands slammed down on my shoulder blades.


He turned around and saw him breathing hard as he slowly pulled out of me. He said "Don't worry - I'm negative"

(Like I totally believe that)

As he slipped back on his butt. I looked up at the black guy and he was still out like a light.

At that point, I felt it was time to make my exit. I stood up and pulled my undergear together. I turned around and the white guy was on his corner seat. He looked at me, gave me a weak salute and began watching the porn again.

I conjured a weak smile myself, and walked out the door. I looked at the black guy and he was still asleep, his half-hard cock leaning against his leg.

Saturday, 22 October 2016

Irish Spring

Dear friends,

Sorry for the long delay in my entries.

I haven’t been well, to be honest. Not STI but equally challenging. Still fighting the good fight, and I’m sure I will be ok soon.

I’m still single, despite the number of dates. So far, no luck.

So I’ve resorted to one night stands and such. The best one was an Irish guy, mid-50’s. We met in a movie house in Kings Cross. Yes, it was one of **those** cinemas that showed straight porn.

See, the nice thing about places like this is that it attracts the guys who are masculine (my type) and rough around the edges. The last guy I met there was so hot who reminded me of my hot ex (who happened to be a model). He was a drunk Eurasian  muscle boy… who turned out to have a 2 inch cock. So, thanks for the fun 2 minutes but gulay, no thanks. Walang challenge.

ANYway, I was there, waiting and watching girl on girl action (sigh. yuck.) and in he came. He was wearing a construction outfit, but (thank goodness) he was not smelly. In fact, in fairness to him, he smelt of vanilla and musk.

That was the first thing I noticed when he sat beside me.

The second thing I noticed was that he was looking at me. At first, deadma kunwari but I was looking out of the corner of my eye. As always, Maria Clara.

But I decided to go for gold and look at him. He was cute, wrinkly but given he was a labourer, forgive. Olay model, he was not.

ANYway, he sat beside me, and I saw immediately the wedding ring. Ah, yes, you must love these closet cases.

It didn’t take him long to pull off his pants, and he was already half-hard. It was cut (how sad) but it was long and thin. It wasn’t the ideal, but it was good enough.

I went down on my knees, and he was ready to go. He pulled down his pants and jocks, and I saw his thin but muscly legs. Hairy sha, but I love it. He kept his top bush slightly trimmed, but his balls and legs were untouched and hairy.

Loved it.

I began my bit, knowing all too well that other guys were around, watching us. I kinda liked being watched, and I think the Irish guy knew it too. He spoke to me in whispers and I have to say that I only understood him half the time. He had a beautiful accent which truly got in the way of my understanding.

Anyway, I stood up and was hoping he could suck me off. But sadly he said he was not into that. He was willing to jack me off, but I decided it was not fun enough. He was willing to suck my nipples and while that was erotic, it was… not me.

I went down on my knees as he stood up, and I continued my thing. He was bucking like there was no tomorrow, and I grabbed his ass – my God. Super firm. My hands continued up and down his body, and his shirt eventually came off, with the name of his company on it. My hands reached up and tweaked his very small nipples.

At that point, he came in my mouth, and that was that. He had roughly four rounds of cum for me, the third one being the biggest load. His spunk was bitter, and not quite tasty, but I do appreciate cum when it is warm and fresh.

He thanked me and his accent made his thanks even cuter. I wish I took his number. I would not have minded his juices in me, but I guess I could chalk that to coulda shoulda woulda.

Sunday, 28 February 2016

Red Cherries

Now, of course, the date with Red has come and gone.

Let me sexplain. He was a Grindr date, and to be honest, he was one of the more peculiar ones around. We talked about chuvah and chenez for around a week, and decided, "sige, let's meet up." I normally don't date 18 year olds, pero ziggy ziggy sputnik. He was very strange about the entire thing, and what I found weirder was that he deleted his profile after we started SMSing. Ako naman, JUH-HURL! Warning bells. Baka naman it turns out he was a stalker or nut job. Afraid akish.

Anyway, day comes, and here he comes, dressed quite nice and casual in his black jeans and white shirt. Hindi kagandahan ang fez (as in. truly.) pero cute naman siya dahil super boyish ang appear. Toned, for sure. We talked for a bit and decided to go for coffee. I went to a cafe that's not too crowded so we could chat na kami lang.

It was a nice conversation naman. It made me feel at ease. While sipping my chai latte, he confessed na, he was horny and ready to go... and beergin zsa.

At this revelation, nalukrey akish. Chai latte spilled, quite graciously I might add, out of my nose.

Graciously, of course.

We chatted about this kasi, well, I don't like forcing people into situations. I told him, in my most Lola Basyang voice, "hija, are you sure about this? Do you want me to be your first?"

He shrugged and smiled.

O sige. Game, game, mga bakla!

We paid (well, I paid) our bill and decided to head off to my place. Of course, may I light the incense, pull the curtains closed, and dim the lights.

I turned around and he was already naked and super hard na sya.

Oh, the wonders of youth talaga!

Anyway, he was toned, as I noted (trained eye talaga) but definitely not gym buff. He still had baby fat in him, and I thought it just increased his cuteness value. He was definitely pale all over, and his reddish pubes were a sight to hold against his raging penoy. His foreskin was tight naman but he said it was ok.

I knelt down and said "it's definitely ok" and proceeded to suck it hard. My gulay... it was heavenly. It was around 7in long, thin on top but the middle part was very thick. Para syang butt plug.

I love it. I had to stop at one point and say "Your dick is one of the best cocks I've ever had in my mouth" and continued to play around.

At this point, he was lying on the bed and his legs were spread wide. His ass had deep red hair as well, and at one point, he guided my hand towards his hole. Ako naman, why finger when you can tongue? So I proceeded to rim him and that's when his legs really spread apart. Ang sarap niya talaga. At that point, he was playing with his nipple and his other hand began jacking his penoy.

Ako naman, No no no, hija. You don't touch. It's all about the service. So I alternated between his ass and his dick, and he just went nuts. This happened for around a good 5 minutes.

After a while though, I decided ako naman. I stood up and asked him to suck my dick.

Yes, he was obviously new at this.

At that point, I gave up. I knew it was not going to happen. The good side though was that my ass was hovering above his penoy. And I knew it was bingo time.

I got some lube and did me and him. He was breathing heavily at this point and as soon as I sat on him, my god. heaven. As in such a perfect fit.

He slowly pumped and I moved with him. At this point, I got lost in the feeling and my dick was just so pumped and ready to go.

Within a minute, I came on his chest with minimal help from my hand. He just hit my prostate so well.

After a few minutes, I stood up and so did he. He showered up and came back - hard on still happening!

Ako naman, sige. I sucked him off and rimmed him. At that point, I looked at his dick and said this dick was amazing. He said take a pic (and so I did).  I also had a video of him jacking off, red pubes clearly seen. Love it.

He came all over and it was sweet.

He cleaned up and I dropped him off at the station. He thanked me for taking his cherry, and thanked me for it.

A few days ago, I tried SMSing him. No reply. I tried calling him. Dead number.

I guess that was it. At least I have a video and a pic to remind me.


Sunday, 17 January 2016

Kabataan talagah!

Well, friends, it is the start of the new year. New goals. New ambitions. New lahat.

I am still in the dating sphere, pero ngayon, thanks to Grindr, Tinder, Scruffr, Whisper, lahat na ng er sa mundo ginamit, I am finally embarking on my first blind date for the year.

What do we know about fafa? Well, he's young...as in, 18 years old. I told him my age (my botox and I are 24 for life) but somehow he's really excited for the date. He's a carrot-top and... well, he's keen. He sent me his ari by email, and my gawd, maganda siya. I love foreskin and the pula pubes kaya we will see what will happen.

I honestly think it's not going to work... but I love the opportunity! Plus, there is something nice about being able to play around as though teenager pa run aces. He's of legal age (or so he says) so yay.

Anyway, have a wonderful and exciting 2016 everyone!

Thursday, 7 January 2016

January Update

Before anything else:

Alen: Clearly not everything with Ed has been closed. See below. (Sigh)
Simon: HELLOUGH-HAH! Thanks for the well wishes! I love that background! Bonggacious!

Well, ladies and gents, 2015 has cum to an end. It was a productive year and Juice Meh! It's been interesting.

I decided to host a party to celebrate the end of the year, just a handful of friends - nothing spectacular. Out of pure stupidity, I invited Edward... and he came... with a date. Toni. Yes, ghurl sya.

In fairness, maganda and tall ang lowkah. And mabait. And machika. So sige. I will Miss Colombia the shit out of this. Some of my friends, who are familiar with our drama, had their eyebrows raised, pero since Ms Congeniality ako, they followed suit.

At one point, Edward cornered me in the kitchen, while I was Betty Drapering. Toni was being made chicka so it was just the two of us. In a strange way, he tried to be chicka and (heavens!) even flirtatious. Pero ako, composed as ever, with all intentions of winning the evening gown competition, and super noncommittal with matching smile slit hanggang earrings!

We are still... friends? And he's asked to come in sometime this January... Pero ako, I don't know. Miss na miss ko ang gintong ari. Mayroon pa rin akong mga pic niya so maybe hanggang yun na lang. One of these days, I will delete to death... kahit sayang.

In other good news, I have a blind date this Saturday with a redhead. We'll see.